6 Things to Avoid When Building Your Self-Esteem

We all wonder how to stay calm, composed, and maintain self-esteem in a tough environment. Here are six things you should avoid when trying to build self-esteem. Don’t allow these things to get the best of you. 

1. Other People’s Behavior

People who are bulldozers, brown nosers, whiners, backstabbers, snipers, people walking wounded, controllers, naggers, complainers, and exploders will pose bad vibes for your self-esteem, as well as to your self-improvement scheme.

2. Changing Environment

Changes challenge our paradigms. They test our flexibility, adaptability, and alters the way we think. Changes will make life difficult for a while, it may cause stress, but they will help us find ways to improve ourselves. Change is permanent; we must be susceptible to it.

3. Negative Work Environment

Beware of the “dog eat dog” theory where everyone else is fighting to get ahead. Here is where non-appreciative people usually thrive. No one will appreciate your contributions even if you miss lunch and dinner, and stay up late. Most of the time, you get to work too much without getting help from people concerned. Competition is at stake anywhere. It will ruin your self-esteem. Be healthy enough to compete, but in healthy competition.

4. Past Experience

It’s normal to experience pain, but don’t let pain transform itself into fear. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson. 

5. Negative Worldviews

Whatever you’re looking at, don’t wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. When building self-esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.

6. Determination Theory

The way you are and your behavioral traits are said to be a mixed end product of your inherited traits (genetics), your upbringing (psychic), and your environmental surroundings such as your spouse, the company, the economy, or your circle of friends. You have your own identity. If your father is a failure, it doesn’t mean you have to be a failure too. Learn from other people’s experiences, so you’ll never have to encounter the same mistakes. 


You have the choice to be positive and stay positive. Building self-esteem and drawing lines for self-improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent. It’s hard to stay tough, especially when things and people around you keep pulling you down.

When you get to the battlefield, choose the right armor: The armor of self-change. Along the battle, we will get hit and bruised. And wearing a bulletproof armor like self-change means that you’ll change from within. Voluntarily. Transforming your attitudes, behaviors, and thoughts.

Start to become responsible for who you are, what you have, and what you do. This form of self-esteem will eventually lead you to self-improvement. When we develop self-esteem, we take control of our mission, values, and discipline. Self-esteem brings about self-improvement, reliable assessment, and determination. 

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